STORY: Click Away

Many things appear easy to do until the day you find yourself having to do it.

I always thought that moving forward was easy and I always found myself wondering why everyone makes such a big deal of it. And then one day I realized that moving forward was always easy for me because nothing ever happened to me that held me back. Now that this something has happened to me, I find it absolutely difficult to let go of what happened. I hold on to every bit of that memory even though how painful it is  to do so because I am afraid I might forget the hurt and forgive too easily. I'm afraid that if I simply let the past stay in the past, I might allow history to repeat itself all too soon. But I guess that theory isn't working very well for me. Because all this lingering in the past and holding on to bits and pieces of it has not only made my present 10 times more unbearable than it should be but has also made my future a terrible place to look forward to. In the end, I lose if I don't let go. I lose if I don't forgive. I lose if I don't give myself a chance to move forward and be happy again.

So the first move I guess is to stop all these stalking and investigating and all these unnecessary researching. I have been doing so for weeks and yet haven't found a single thing wrong. And what is worse, I still find myself irritated, mad and frustrated every time I see a certain name pop out regardless if it is related to my problem or not. After some repeated lectures from people around me, I finally found myself willing to listen. To finally be happy again, I should stop surrounding myself with things that only make me feel otherwise. So here is to making that first step... no matter how simple it may appear and how it difficult it really is.


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