THEORY: Relative Age

I like to think of age like gender. I mean, gender has a whole lot of interpretations compared to your biological sex... you can't just be a male or female. You are either a girl, a boy, gay, bisexual, lesbian, etc. And as the years go by, more and more versions and combinations of these come out. You can never be sure what a person really is until you ask him/her or get to know him/her. And I am not saying that is a bad thing, actually, I love it! I love how much progress society is taking towards accepting people as they are, giving each other the freedom to express themselves without any pretensions. 

So back to age. When you talk about age in a biological sense, I am 21. There is no arguing about that, just check my birth certificate. It's the same way I can't argue about being born female. But age isn't that easy to define, just the way you can't really be sure I'm a girl (well, unless I tell you... so, I'm a girl. There, I told you). There are days I feel older, there are days I feel younger, actually, my age depends on where I am and who I'm with. And I bet that's how it works for everyone, too!

It just sucks that I have to feel bad about not being a certain age when in my head, I feel I am that age! Do you get me? It's a little hard to explain. Hmmm. Example time! Imagine I'm with a group of 15 year olds talking about Hannah Montana. In my head, I can still talk about Hannah Montana because I like Hannah Montana, so technically I am 15 years old in that moment. But I have to feel bad about it because I am labeled as 21 and liking Hannah Montana is not allowed anymore (the same way a lesbian is tagged weird for wanting to do things a boy would typically do because she is labeled a girl). Another example. I like listening to old songs (well, the songs I hear from my Dad), and when I'm in a group of 20 year olds, I feel I'm too young to be listening to these songs when in reality, I am already 40 in my head! In short, I feel bad about not acting my age when really, I am acting the age I feel I am.

Waaaah. I think I am getting worse at explaining things. Did I just confuse you even more? Anyway, for those of you who actually understood what I pathetically tried to get across, here is my simple point: I want to be able to be who I want to be. I don't want to feel too young or too old because people pressure me to act a certain way, in this case, act 21 (see the connection with gender? Society has certain rules that girls and boys should live by the same way we are told to act a certain way based on our age). Actually, I'm not mad at anyone for this situation, it's just the way things are and I accept that. I'm actually doing this post for myself. I'm telling myself not to care, and since you're reading this post now, I'm telling you as well. It's a hard world out there so it's best to have someone stupid enough to go against it with me! Haha. 

Gender took a long, long time for society to finally be open to having more than two. Maybe in the next few years, we will be allowed to act more than one age as well... maybe. But now that  I think of it, it might not totally be a good thing (imagine all the crazy people who decide they are actually 5 years old!) but we'll cross the bridge when we get there.  :P 

I think this has got to be my most sabaw post. Oh well!

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