STORY: Work Tears

I know I just blogged about work and how I shouldn't be complaining about where I am and what I'm doing... but I can't help but post yet another one. I am just so tired. I think it's a perfectly reasonable feeling. I work morning to night, Monday to Friday and it's like I'm never given a chance to catch my breathe. I'm just soooo tired that the only thing left to do is cry in hopes that the aches and the pains go out of my body with the tears. 

Kbye. I have more work to do. And yeah, it's 10pm. 

STORY: The Future Has Arrived


I never had any childhood friends. Maybe it's because we moved a lot (although always around Manila) so I never really got the chance to develop relationships with other children longer than two years. Or, it could be that my brother and I were rarely allowed to go out because we grew up with the busy city streets outside our front door. But honestly, I believe I never had any childhood friends because as early as 3 to 4 years old, I was already the snobbish girl I [appear to be] am today.

THEORY: Andy Sketches - Through The Years Edition!


I have always loved drawing. Ever since I could remember, I would ask for crayons, pencils and sketch pads during birthdays and christmases.  Eventually, I would ask for more "grown up" art materials like paint, brushes, oil pastels, and markers.

STORY: Fighting the Gen Y Gene


Please read this article before reading the post below: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/wait-but-why/generation-y-unhappy_b_3930620.html

The post above could not have come along my news feed at a more appropriate time. After all my blog posts ranting about career related stress (Read this, this, this, and this. I rant a lot, don't I?), this article has enlightened me as to why this is so. 

I belong to a generation of self-entitled, shortcut loving, ambitious people. I fully admit that I fit the bill perfectly.... but! Do know that I do not do this consciously. I only realised I was being such when I read through the article. I never thought of my stress as coming from an over ambitious idea of my future and a ridiculous sense of being special. Not that I'm washing my hands of any of the fault here, but we, Gen Y, are raised by our parents to be this way so technically, we are over ambitious and self-entitled by default. But no use pointing fingers now, huh? Moving on...

After reading the article, I reflected on where my problems were coming from and I started to look at myself as an arrogant, impatient and over ambitious 21 year old. I would love to smack myself on the head for feeling bad about where I am at my age and for feeling like I deserved more for what I have to offer. All my rant posts are starting to sound too silly for me to feel sympathy for any of them any more!

It's so crazy that just the other day I was talking about all the things I must achieve by the time I reach 25. In my head, 4 years is enough time for me to reach this ideal level of success. But looking at the charts in the article, I am being delusional! The level of success I want to achieve is not equal to the amount of time I am allotting. I want things to kick start now and reach its peak at too fast a rate. I don't have the skills, the experience or the blood, sweat and tears poured out on anything yet to demand so much from the world! I repeat, this is so crazy of me!

After reading the article, I gained a new perspective on my work life. I now feel ashamed about feeling bad about my current state but at the same time I now feel determined to prove that I can give the work and effort and gain the experience the generation ahead of me had to earn to get the success I want.

Note to self: Patience is a virtue and there is no shortcut to success. Repeat 1000x

STORY: 8 Minutes

It's 6:42 AM and I've had enough internal rants to last me a week. I was grumbling while I fed the dog. I was grunting while I took a shower. I was snarking while I picked out the top I was going to wear today. But thank God for the shuffle feature on iPods. Passenger Seat came on (don't ask why this song, just go with it) and blasted drom my dock and I found myself singing my heart out to the song and forgot to grumble, grunt or snark at any point! I was happy for a moment and told myself this must be blogged. 

Then I grumbled, grunted and snarked again because of the slooooow internet and how my sudden happiness was slowing fading before I could even write about it. You know my blogging is very dependent on my emotions and the words I've already typed in would have sounded so much more gleeful if the internet had loaded this page 10 minutes sooner. 

But there's no use crying over spilled milk (or slow internet) so what is the point of this post, huh? Well, it's to share one of the many "What has Andrea learned today?" moments. Well, for this episode, I learned that I shouldn't let the anticipated stress ruin the moment that is happening right now. Imagine, I ruined my morning because of something that has yet to happen. I love taking my showers. I let myself, well, my mind, loose in those 10-15 minutes. I go to the craziest and happiest places in those few minutes and I threw it away on negativity. 

But again, this is so much easier in theory. It's not an easy task to shut your brain off, or to at least direct it to the thoughts you want to entertain... especially with me, the person who likes to think of everything! 

I just glanced at the time and it's already 6:50am. I have about 10 minutes to finish fixing my bag, put on some eyebrows and dash out the door to face that stress I've been anticipation all morning. Oh, joy! Not.



P.S. Although getting all these feelings out has relieved me of some of the stress so, yay!

STORY: Stress is making me more prayerful

Lord, please give me the patience and strength to hang on a little longer. Let me stay for as long as I need to. Don't let me give up and don't let me give in without having anything to fall to. Don't let me abuse the freedom (I think) I have. Don't let the thoughts of possibly quitting and running away from responsibility enter my mind and let those negative thoughts that are already in my mind out.

Lord, help me during this troubling time when the rest of my life feels like it's sitting on my shoulders. The weight is figuratively and literally bringing me down most days and it's a feeling that I don't think I can get used to, nor do I want to get used to. Let the rest of my life know that I don't want it hovering around and reminding me about all the things I need to do at a certain time at a certain place. I can't handle the stress right now and even if I could, I don't want to handle it. 

Lord, it's almost midnight yet again and I will have to savor the next 6 hours of sleep that I can. Let's have this "conversation" again the next time I have 30 minutes of my 8-hour life-out-of-work to spare. Good night. I shall continue praying to you offline now. 

STORY: Lazy

I am sooooo lazy over the weekends that getting anything done is a miracle! But cut me some slack. The entire week I am basically a machine that times in and out of the house (take note, house! It's like I'm a border at my own home now) at 8am and 11pm respectively. I don't have time to be lazy, to sleep, to watch TV, to mindlessly surf the net for 5 days straight! So it isn't totally unreasonable for me to want to do all those things during the weekends because those are the only days I could. 


But that being the case, I never get any of the things I said I would do done. I have been putting off my salon visit for months and now my hair is a total disaster. The idea that I would be wasting 5 hours of my weekend sitting at a salon versus lying in my sleepwear while watching TV just makes me depressed! I want to get my hair done but I don't want to get out of bed either! I also haven't burned any of the DVDs I said I would and it has been over a month already. I told myself I would reboot my old laptop so it would function faster but before I could, I need to burn all my files, particularly TV shows, first. But surprise, surprise, my laptop has been functioning like a snail for months while the DVDs I bought have been collecting dust on the side (Can I get a pat on the back for actually buying those DVDs? I postponed buying those DVDs for weeks as well!)

But good news though. I am finally starting to burn those DVDs. Unfortunately, burning the DVDs is taking waaaaaaay longer than I hoped and my lazy self is taking over again. I'm just 10% in from burning the FIRST DVD and I'm already thinking of stopping and going back to bed and rolling with my sheets until time for mass at 6pm. 

Please help me get this DVD burning done so I can force myself to go to the salon next weekend! 

STORY: The Downside of Blogging

Cringe worthy grammar, definitely! 

If only I had the time and will power to edit all my mistakes in my previous blog posts, I would! But that would defeat the purpose of blogging. Blogging is supposed to capture who you are at the time of posting so if you were a person (a.k.a. me) who didn't know the difference between "it's" and "its" two years ago, then suffer a lifetime of remembrance!

How embarrassing! 

STORY: Blog Makeover for the Nth Time

I am so happy with how my new layout turned out. The colors are great, the icons are great, the photo sizes are great, too! Actually, I am just really happy that I finally got to do this kind of thing again. I sorely miss spending hours and hours on editing photos, videos, layouts and not stopping until I'm satisfied. I know I'm just talking about a blog here, but when I do these things, editing, blogging, designing, I just feel so happy. I can't put into words this feeling I have now more appropriately than with passion. It's just a different joy when you do things for passion and apparently, all it takes for me to recharge, and rid myself of all these looming bad vibes, is to visit these "passion" activities of mine once in a while. 


It's quite ironic though that these activities that take me hours to complete, causing me to lose sleep over the weekend, the only days I have time to sleep more than 6 hours, are what makes me feel energized and ready to head back to the daily grind. 

Ahhh, I can't concentrate on this post because I just want to stare at my new layout again. Bye.

STORY: Graduation Getaway

I have a bunch of whiny posts coming up (well, I hope are coming up... because you know, I might not have the time, as usual) but please let me get this one awesome post out of the way first.



Jose finally graduated last August 29 at PICC. I say "finally" not out of annoyance (like when you finally get that food stuck in your teeth since lunch out... uh, ew?) or relief (like when somebody finally says something about the insane number of selfies your narcissist online friend posts) but out of happiness long overdue (like when you finally see two people get married... but mistake no marriages in this story!) I am just really, sincerely, overly happy about Jose reaching this milestone after the long, back and forth, almost stepping off track journey that is college!