THEORY: Dream Home

I've always, always dreamed of having my own home someday. At first, I wanted to build it from scratch... have all my fantasy details come to life. As the years went by, I was ol to buy a house already made, as if what's stopping me is merely my preference. Fast forward to today, I think I may havebu consciously pushed my dreams of having a home aside. It's still one of my heart's biggest desires, since I've never really had a a e to really call my own, but the reality of the dream is just too painful to face.

Just thinking of my dream house makes me feel depressed. What I used to spend hours daydreaming about (actually, I even go as far as drawing and creating 3d models of it!), has now become a source of pain. The helplessness I feel for not being able to give the dream house to myself and my family just hurts so much.

I don't know what to do. I've never wanted money to rule my decisions in life but with what I'm feeling now, it looks like money will be one of my biggest decision makers. Which is anothet realization that makes me sad. I dont want to be a slave to money but only by being such can I fulfill my dream. Ugh. There's just no winning!

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